Showing posts with label advertisement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label advertisement. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Rock Heroes at Wal-Mart
"Rock Heroes. The biggest collection of rock hits from your favorite video games"
Is that really the tagline for a new CD compilation being sold at Wal-Mart?
Yes, it is.
Have Rock Band and Guitar Hero become so popular that the now spawn CD collections?
Yes, they have.
But the ad goes on:
"Includes, The Scorpions, Billy Idol, Kiss, Boston, Survivor. Rock Heroes. All remastered. Alice Cooper, Ratt, Night Ranger, and Many More. Rock Heroes. In stores now. Only at Wal-Mart."
Of course while the hyper-masculine voice is spouting these words, the viewer is treated to a few bars of songs such as "Rebel Yell," and "Rock you Like a Hurricane," accompanied by clips of the artists in full form. Then, in case you couldn't hear the announcer, or didn't recognize the song, the name of each artist EXPLODES ONTO THE SCREEN IN HUGE SOLID GOLD LETTERS WITH FLAMING RED OUTLINE*
RATT
NIGHT RANGER
And many more.
Save money. Live better. Klaus Varley.
Oops. I mean, Wal-Mart.
Man, this stuff gets in your head. Maybe it's not such a cheesy advertisement after all.
Nah, it is.
-KV
*(Apparently I do not have "flaming red outline" capability)
Friday, June 20, 2008
The iAss Mano
The New iAss Mano
The World's First Multi-Functional Wireless Gastrointestinal Accessory.
Full of Love
The iAss Mano is the result of rethinking conventions. It's ultrathin, ultraportable, and ultra unlike anything you've attached to your ass.
Full of Magic
In a world in which public toilets are increasingly unsanitary or unusable, iAss is so fast and so available, people are truly living untethered — surfing the web, making calls, listening to MP3s...vaporizing anything that comes out.
Full of Future Upgrades
Coming soon: the iAss Mano 2.0 - firming the tush as it works its magic and love.
The new standard of mobile efficiency is here. The iAss Mano.
Everyone will beg to kiss your iAss Mano.
[This advertisement has been brought to you by Laura Daye of Brain Transplant Journal. Check out BTJ today!]
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