Five things Twitter is Good For

Five Things Twitter is Good For
Klaus Varley

Note: this piece was written in June of 2009. If you are reading this and Twitter is obsolete - like, say, it's July 2009 - please feel free to change the title (in your mind) to Five Things Twitter WAS Good For. Thanks! - KV

1. Starting a revolution in Iran.

2. Meeting shy exhibitionists.

3. Tracking celebrities (like Shaq). Hearing about their surprisingly boring lives, and their less surprising lack of insight on it.

4. Reading about people who run and tweet at the same time (like anotorias) while you sit on your ass and surf the web.

5. Seriously, it might actually good for people with the same interests in things (food, movies, Iranian politics...) as long as the tweets stay on topic.

I can't believe I used "tweets" non-ironically in a sentence.

Or can I?

Hit me up on Twitter to find out!

http://twitter.com/KlausVarley

-KV

Klaus Varley on Twitter

In case you didn't get it, the title "Klaus Varley on Twitter" has two meanings - Klaus Varley using Twitter AND Klaus Varley writing about Twitter in this post. -KV

We got it. -Charlie Luzon, on behalf of everyone with eyes.

Hey, you said something funny. Record this in the history books. -KV

Just start your piece. -Charlie

One last question. Do you Twit--(Message truncated -ed.)

Klaus Varley on Twitter
Klaus Varley

Not one to jump on the bandwagon too quickly, we waited until the wagon was out of site, through the Donner pass, and safely at Grandma's house before seeing what this "Twitter" was all about.

If you have a Twitter account, please ADD ME or FOLLOW ME or whatever the hell you do, 'cause I have like TWO friends.

http://twitter.com/KlausVarley

If you don't have a twitter account, don't know what I'm talking about, also lost the wagon a while back, take a deep breath and click the link below:

http://twitter.com/KlausVarley

It's painless. Just click, create a password, and you're up and running.

On Twitter, people write what they are doing. Or a thought that comes to their head. Then their followers see these short posts.

It's a lot like Facebook status updates.

In other words, it only works when people do interesting things or have entertaining thoughts.

I, Klaus Varley, will do my best to follow these self-imposed guidelines.

Looking for other people to follow? Michael Ian Black is funny. Shaq is funny (without trying). Wil Wheaton is kinda funny (but way nerdy).

People I would follow on Twitter if they had an account:

Barack Obama (oh wait, he does of course.)
John McCain
Kim Jong-il
Jenna Bush
Tom from MySpace
Bill Gates

I could go on, but I think we've learned a valuable lesson from this list of important and famous people: there is great comedic potential in fake-celebrity Twitter accounts.

Seriously.

-KV