Klaus Varley
I moved in with my girlfriend this year. My girlfriend and her cat, Little, a housecat that we don't let outside the condo.
(Little isn't the cat's real name, but everyone has a pseudonym on this site, why not Little?)
Little is not a bright cat. I grew up with cats, so I can make this judgment.
Little is also scared of everything. It's as if she believes she is always narrowly escaping a harrowing situation, as if she's the feline James Bond.
Though it's hard to know exactly what she thinks, by observing her behavior a careful student of cats (I grew up with them, remember?) can assess from her actions her ideas. Here are a few things Little probably believes:
1. Walking across the bedroom floor triggers a door, inside of which rows and rows of cloth dangle curiously from a great height. However, some of this cloth is in convenient stacks, many good for laying upon, some even shaped like a cat bed. Could this be the bed cave, foretold in the scripture of ancient Friskies bags and prophesied by the orange one known only as Garfield?
2. If I sleep for too long in the bed cave, the opening to the bed cave closes for no apparent reason. No! My meows summon a god-like presence, its footsteps and voice rattling the floor. I flee without getting a good look at the figure, getting a safe distance between me, the cave, and the monster who rules it. The cave is a trap! I must warn the others!
3. I have in my possession a bowl that magically refills with dried food when I eat it down to the last four or five pieces. I call it the Endless Bowl of Life. I do not know where I got this magical bowl, but one does not question such miracles.
4. There is another one of my kind that lives on the "outside." I have heard him referred to as Sam. I call him "Same."
5. One day, I went into the other room and when I came back to my normal sitting space in the living room there was a cardboard bed. My first thought was that it looked cheap, and why would I need that when I was perfectly content to scratch on the carpet and the walls? But then a smell emanating from the bed hit me. I had to scratch it and rub my face in it and roll on it! God, what is that smell, give me more!!! This bed is the greatest!
5.5 After calming down, I discovered the substance is kept in a plastic bag and brought out only on special occasions. And it only comes when I'm on the bed. I will wait for it here.
Not so little, Little-KV
3 comments:
I like that Little's cat toy is hanging out of the cable outlet.
Little may or may not be that bright. But after leaving the condo and coming back 2 hours later, lugging armfuls of groceries, to find her lounging in the exact same spot as before, I am starting to realize that she may be brighter than either of us.
L - On first look it may appear that way, but actually the toy is separate.
GF - Sure, I just meant compared to other cats, she may not be the brightest kitten in the Meowmix.
But intelligence for species works differently. Cats > humans > dogs > republicans...or something like that.
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