Thursday, January 1, 2009

The Literary Brothel's New Year's Resolutions


Because we're always looking forward, or at least WANT to always be looking forward (see Resolution #7), here is a list of all the things we at The Literary Brothel hope to accomplish in 2009. -KV

The Literary Brothel's New Year's Resolutions

1. Edit and release that damn Best of The Literary Brothel book you've been promised for eight months now.

2. Respond to ALL comments made on our posts. It's one way to thank people for reading, and/or anger them so they curse our name. Hey, at least they'll be saying our name.

3. Exercise regularly.

4. Write post after post with "Wil Wheaton" in the the title as to attract Wesley Crusher himself to the site, and Brothelize a small percentage of his legion of internet fans.

5. Name names.

6. Search for other creative writers. Find at least two other people who are NOT Klaus Varley to write for the site on a regular basis. Reward them with fedoras.

7. Find out what "the kids" are listening to these days. Emulate them. Become cool, but act like you don't care about superficial things like "coolness." Then return to normal, shun your new friends, and convince your old friends that you never forgot about them, even when you were cool. That's looking forward.

8. Write a recurring piece covering the best things about LA. Yes, I said "recurring." There are a lot of great things about LA. I'll show you, you naysayers...

9. Finish that screenplay, sell it, and move to the beach. I mean, closer to the beach.

10. Remember that "New Year's" as in "The Literary Brothel's New Year's Resolutions" has an apostrophe "s" and is NOT spelled "New Years Resolution." Not that I did that this year and had to go back and correct it. Not at all.

-TLB

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What do YOU want to accomplish next year (besides procrastinating all that work nonsense by reading The Literary Brothel at least twice a week)?
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4 comments:

Anonymous said...

A fedora to anyone who contributes to the Brothel, huh? Random. But cool.

Klaus Varley said...

That's not a new years resolution.

Or is it?

Alix said...

I want a sombrero. Additionally, a new wednesday boyfriend.

Klaus Varley said...

To clarify, I was only referred to as your "Wednesday boyfriend" by your real boyfriend, who might have said it bitterly? Hard to tell.

I was more like your "Wednesday Yoga-beach-sandwich buddy." In other words, your gay friend.

Try Chevy's for the sombrero. Seriously.

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